As I'm retyping all of this for the
second time, after the first copy deleted itself, I'm thinking it's a good
thing it's about watching our words because I am certainly having to watch mine
at this point.
I'm a big fan of
quotes...books...songs...poems..and just words in general.
Lately I've been thinking a lot about
the power of words, and it has had me reflecting on how words have affected me.
There are four questions I have for
you to think about.
•When have
words hurt you?
•When
have words encouraged you?
•When
have you hurt others with your words?
•When
have you encouraged others with your words?
Proverbs 18:21 says, "Life and death are in the power of the tongue,
and those who love it will eat its fruit."
There have been so many times in my
life when I've been hurt by words or lifted up by them.
During one of the roughest times of
my life, my “fat years” as I refer to the time between age 9 and 14/15, I felt
the effect of words a lot. I got made fun of and people would often say rude
comments to me, including people that I loved. It certainly didn’t help my self-esteem
at all. Throughout the whole time though, my mom would constantly tell me I was
beautiful. She was biased, but she also believed that telling me would affirm
me and encourage me. A few years later, and I still look in the mirror sometimes
and hate what I see, but I have learned that I am beautiful in my own way. My
mom really encouraged me though, and still encourages me on days when I am
having a rough time accepting who I am.
For my graduation party, I had people
write words of advice to me. My cousin Shawn and I are very close and when I
was going through my advice cards I found one from him.
It says,
Elizabeth,
Your “gut” or inner instinct will be a guide when your mind is unable to
understand. Your path will be unique because you are unique. Allow yourself the
“freedom” to be you.
This one index card full of words has
become a tremendous blessing to me. Last semester, I put it on the front of my
anatomy binder because I knew it was going to be a very tough class and that I
would need encouragement. Now, I keep the card on my bulletin board in my room
so I can always read it.
On the other hand though, there have
been many times when I spoke carelessly and have hurt people. I have destroyed peoples’
precious feelings with my unkind words. I have helped to break friendships.
It is so easy to catch myself
gossiping about people. What gives me the right to have opinions about peoples’
lives? To think that I am any better than they are? Oh, the things we say when
we think people can’t hear…
I sit with my church family and they
tear people up just like anyone else. As Christ-followers, aren’t we supposed to
encourage one another and build each other up? There is a difference between
speaking the truth in love and gossiping/sharing your opinion.
The book of James has a whole passage
on controlling our tongues.
James 3:1-12
“Not many
should become teachers, my brothers, knowing that we will receive a stricter
judgment, 2 for we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble
in what he says,[a] he is a
mature man who is also able to control his whole body.[b]
3 Now when we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them
obey us, we also guide the whole animal.[c] 4 And
consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided
by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5 So
too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things.
Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites. 6 And the tongue
is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among the parts of
our bodies. It pollutes the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is
set on fire by hell.
7 Every sea creature, reptile, bird, or animal is tamed and
has been tamed by man, 8 but no man can tame the tongue. It is a
restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 We praise our[d] Lord and
Father with it, and we curse men who are made in God’s likeness with it. 10
Praising and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these
things should not be this way. 11 Does a spring pour out sweet and
bitter water from the same opening? 12 Can a fig tree produce
olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater
spring yield fresh water.”
“We curse men who are made in God’s
likeness” – Isn’t that the same as cursing God?
There are two other verses that go
hand-in-hand.
Matthew 15:18 - “But what comes out of the mouth comes from the heart,
and this defiles a man.”
And Proverbs 4:23 says, “Guard your heart above all else, for it is the
source of life.”
If you aren’t guarding your heart,
which is the source of life, then anything could come out. And if it is a
reflection of your heart, then you definitely want to be careful with what is coming
out. When I am cursing in anger or gossiping about people, my heart is not
where I want it to be. I want a heart that is full with loving God and loving
people. Therefore, I want my words to reflect that.
“Mrs. Retallack used two chambers
(and fresh plants). She placed radios in each chamber. In one chamber, the
radio was tuned to a local rock station, and in the other the radio played a
station that featured soothing "middle-of-the-road" music. Only three
hours of music was played in each chamber. On the fifth day, she began noticing
drastic changes. In the chamber with the soothing music, the plants were
growing healthily and their stems were starting to bend towards the radio! In
the rock chamber, half the plants had small leaves and had grown gangly, while
the others were stunted. After two weeks, the plants in the soothing-music
chamber were uniform in size, lush and green, and were leaning between 15 and
20 degrees toward the radio. The plants in the rock chamber had grown extremely
tall and were drooping, the blooms had faded and the stems were bending away
from the radio. On the sixteenth day, all but a few plants in the rock chamber
were in the last stages of dying. In the other chamber, the plants were alive,
beautiful, and growing abundantly.”
Now I am in no way saying that I
dislike rock music or think it’s bad, because rock is one of my favorite
genres. But I just find it interesting that the different music types have such
an effect on plants. If songs can have that effect on plants, then how much
more so could our words have on the living, breathing people around us?!
Only you can decide how your words
are used. Will you use them to lift people up or to tear people down? How hard
is it to complement people? What impression do you want people to have of you?
Do you want them to picture you as an angry, hypocritical person? Or would you
rather be known as a kind and joyful person?
I often think about how I would want
to be remembered if I died. So I try to portray the person I want to be known
as. I have come to the conclusion that I would like to be remembered for
smiling a lot and for having the joy of Jesus! In order to do this, I must
remind myself to be a loving person to the people around me. I must remember to
speak life into people.
The final thing is a song that has
been stuck in my head a lot lately.
Hawk Nelson “Words”
Sources:
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