You
know how sometimes you feel like you are looking over the edge of a cliff and
you have to take a leap of faith? Well, I’m pretty sure I threw up over the
cliff’s edge today.
I
really was trying to get into a school district so I could get experience in
school therapy. I interviewed/talked to several positions that wanted someone
with more experience. 5 days ago I took an interview for Lancaster, California
(about an hour out of LA). I basically went into it thinking in my mind “I don’t
want this position. I don’t even like California. I’m just going to take this
interview to practice.” Well, Jesus had other plans. So I take the interview
and to my surprise, it sounded like a really good opportunity. It’s working in
schools in several districts. And the ladies I interviewed with were very nice
and told me all about the area and things to do.
So
I get off the phone. Still not really wanting to go to California but thinking it’s
a great opportunity, I have a little better mindset to consider it. My agent
sends me the contract pay package and lets me know that I can submit it before
they even offer me a job and see if they accept it. I told her that I would
think about it and let her know Tuesday.
All
weekend, I am back and forth about it, and freaked out, and knowing that it
will be a great opportunity but stressing about how flexible I will have to be
with it, and just getting really tired of my analytical mind.
By
this morning I had decided to submit it and I prayed over and over that if I
was supposed to go there that they would accept it, and if not, that they would
deny it. When I sent my agent my agreement, she replied back with, “That’s
great! They emailed me yesterday and said they would LOVE to have you!” While
we waited to hear back from them, I felt so sick and nervous and keyed up. So I
took a nap on the car ride back home from my mini vacation. A few hours later,
the contract was signed and I’M GOING TO CALIFORNIA for 10 months!
As
soon as I heard the news, my body calmed. I’m still scared and freaked out, but
now I’m also excited! I know that I will learn so much, especially on how to be
flexible and to have faith.
As
I was trying to make a decision, I was reading quotes and Bible verses about
fear. And one thing that really stuck with me was, “Whatever you are most
afraid of, do that because it will require the most from you.” Not only will it
require the most from me, but it will require me to rely more on God, just like
I should. To step out in faith.
There
have been many times the past few days where I’ve pretty much convinced myself
I’m insane to put myself through this much stress to be a travel COTA, but the
amount of growth I’ve seen in myself, as I trust God more, give up control, and
learn more about who and how God created me to be, it’s totally worth it.
I
am excited to be working with kids! I am excited to be doing more traveling! I
ask that you would be praying for me the next month or two. As I transition out
there in the next few weeks and drive across the U.S. and getting into the routine (or as much of a
routine as I can have) of work. I ask that you would pray that I listen clearly
to what the Holy Spirit is telling me and guiding me, and that all the details
would work out.
Here’s
to new adventures and throwing myself completely outside of my comfort zone!
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