"Pause.
Breathe.
Repair your universe.
Proceed."
-Unknown
Some days my fear-filled fingers are googling answers as fast as they can type. Some days apologies ring out of my mouth for running late to things or my messy in-process home. Some days the knot in my stomach grows and my mind frantically races. Some days even the most mundane things seem like a mountain to accomplish.
Then. I turn off my phone. I take a deep breath. And another. And another.
I have found that walks outside, especially in the cold, are a sure way to untangle thoughts and bring peace. I am so thankful I can do that in my neighborhood. Stepping over sidewalk cracks, and around annoying piles of dog doo, I stand at my favorite spot and look down over the city. I breathe deeply of the cold, snappy air. I stand in awe of the glorious colors of sunset.
I breathe in. I breathe out.
Here’s the thing about fear, it creeps in and claws around inside of me until every cell feels like it’s quaking. The questions and what-ifs fill my mind until I am so exhausted. The more I fight, the harder it comes. The harder I fight, the more distracted it makes me.
So I stop fighting. I breathe. In and out. My lungs doing what they were made to do. My heart beating in my chest.
I acknowledge the fear, but make the choices to prove it won’t stop me.
Elizabeth Gilbert has a fabulous quote in her book “Big Magic” that hit me like a ton of bricks because it speaks of my fragile relationship with fear and in the language of my very favorite road trips and adventures -
“Fear, I recognize and respect that you are part of this family, and so I will never exclude you from our activities, but still – your suggestions will never be followed. You’re allowed to have a voice but you are not allowed to have a vote. You’re not allowed to touch the road maps; you’re not allowed to suggest detours; you’re not allowed to fiddle with the temperature. Dude, you’re not even allowed to touch the radio. But, above all else, my dear old familiar friend, you are absolutely forbidden to drive.”
There is power in pausing and processing.
To Pause
I often listen to the Lectio 365 app to start my morning commute with awareness. Lectio Divina is a contemplative practice of scripture reading, meditation, and prayer. It is teaching me to start my days with an intentional pause.
I take walks or hikes or exercise at the gym. It physically exhausts me while mentally recharges me. Sometimes a sprint as fast as I can helps me feel like I’m outrunning whatever is chasing me.
At home, I sit in my bean bag corner or on my balcony. I listen to the sounds of nature or a meditation app or an instrumental soundtrack. I take time to sit and be silent. To let the day wash away and to let grace and gratitude overcome me.
To Process
I acknowledge what I’m feeling. I give appreciation for being able to feel emotions. Even fear and anger. I teach my kids at work about self-regulation and how to appropriately identify and process emotions. I teach them that there are no bad emotions. Even anger has its place. But, do I believe that about fear? I get so tired of feeling inhibited. But in pausing, I remember that some fear protects. When I travel solo, fear reminds me to be on my guard and aware. Fear reminds me to make wise choices. But, fear is not supposed to inhibit me from living my life.
I journal and write things I'm learning, poems I love, songs that inspire me, quotes that challenge me.
I create - painting, making jewelry, drawing, anything.
I take time to think and generate ideas and mull over facts and thoughts. I give myself space. I get comfortable being alone for periods of time.
I'm an external processor a lot of times and this week I took advantage of processing with friends to get prayer and new perspectives and encouragement.
Breathing in, breathing out. That's the way we stay healthy. Mentally, spiritually, physically.
But let me be honest with you, I sucked at pausing and processing the past few weeks and my body is paying the price for it. Now, in addition to re-establishing routines, I'm also needing to create habits to heal.
Things that didn't work the past few weeks -
1. I wasn't mindful about eating in a way that made my body feel the best.
2. I didn't work out which led to me internalizing stress.
3. I had a full schedule and didn't give myself time to decompress, process, and create.
4. I didn't set aside time to have devotions and hear what God was trying to speak to me.
5. I was irritable with Luis over stupid things.
Things that DID work -
1. I practiced new skills by sanding glitter off a room in my house that I am going to be painting.
2. I let myself be vulnerable and cry with friends.
3. I expressed gratefulness for and to my husband for his sweet and kind care of me.
4. I've been reading a book on my lunch break about women pilots - a subject I dearly love. I even got to read it over a latte one evening.
5. I explored locally as I showed a friend around my city and we got to go inside the Reading Pagoda which was really cool.
6. I attended a women's real estate meet-up where I was delightfully taught and challenged about goal setting for a joy-filled life.
7. I booked a solo weekend trip I'll be going on in a few months to relax and create space.
8. Goal setting and date nights with Luis.
But how do I figure these things out? I pause in the midst of chaos and take time to process what is working and what isn't working in my life.
In order to do that, I have to guard my time carefully. I have to say no to people, dreams, ideas, and things that just can't have a place in my life right now. I say yes to things that keep me healthy - time with God, date night with my husband, community with close friends, green tea with ginger and honey, time alone, writing, adventures.
"Practice the pause. When in doubt, pause. When angry, pause. When tired, pause. When stressed, pause. And when you pause, pray."
Breathe.
Repair your universe.
Proceed."
-Unknown
Then. I turn off my phone. I take a deep breath. And another. And another.
I have found that walks outside, especially in the cold, are a sure way to untangle thoughts and bring peace. I am so thankful I can do that in my neighborhood. Stepping over sidewalk cracks, and around annoying piles of dog doo, I stand at my favorite spot and look down over the city. I breathe deeply of the cold, snappy air. I stand in awe of the glorious colors of sunset.
I breathe in. I breathe out.
Here’s the thing about fear, it creeps in and claws around inside of me until every cell feels like it’s quaking. The questions and what-ifs fill my mind until I am so exhausted. The more I fight, the harder it comes. The harder I fight, the more distracted it makes me.
So I stop fighting. I breathe. In and out. My lungs doing what they were made to do. My heart beating in my chest.
I acknowledge the fear, but make the choices to prove it won’t stop me.
Elizabeth Gilbert has a fabulous quote in her book “Big Magic” that hit me like a ton of bricks because it speaks of my fragile relationship with fear and in the language of my very favorite road trips and adventures -
“Fear, I recognize and respect that you are part of this family, and so I will never exclude you from our activities, but still – your suggestions will never be followed. You’re allowed to have a voice but you are not allowed to have a vote. You’re not allowed to touch the road maps; you’re not allowed to suggest detours; you’re not allowed to fiddle with the temperature. Dude, you’re not even allowed to touch the radio. But, above all else, my dear old familiar friend, you are absolutely forbidden to drive.”
There is power in pausing and processing.
To Pause
I often listen to the Lectio 365 app to start my morning commute with awareness. Lectio Divina is a contemplative practice of scripture reading, meditation, and prayer. It is teaching me to start my days with an intentional pause.
I take walks or hikes or exercise at the gym. It physically exhausts me while mentally recharges me. Sometimes a sprint as fast as I can helps me feel like I’m outrunning whatever is chasing me.
At home, I sit in my bean bag corner or on my balcony. I listen to the sounds of nature or a meditation app or an instrumental soundtrack. I take time to sit and be silent. To let the day wash away and to let grace and gratitude overcome me.
To Process
I acknowledge what I’m feeling. I give appreciation for being able to feel emotions. Even fear and anger. I teach my kids at work about self-regulation and how to appropriately identify and process emotions. I teach them that there are no bad emotions. Even anger has its place. But, do I believe that about fear? I get so tired of feeling inhibited. But in pausing, I remember that some fear protects. When I travel solo, fear reminds me to be on my guard and aware. Fear reminds me to make wise choices. But, fear is not supposed to inhibit me from living my life.
I journal and write things I'm learning, poems I love, songs that inspire me, quotes that challenge me.
I create - painting, making jewelry, drawing, anything.
I take time to think and generate ideas and mull over facts and thoughts. I give myself space. I get comfortable being alone for periods of time.
I'm an external processor a lot of times and this week I took advantage of processing with friends to get prayer and new perspectives and encouragement.
Breathing in, breathing out. That's the way we stay healthy. Mentally, spiritually, physically.
But let me be honest with you, I sucked at pausing and processing the past few weeks and my body is paying the price for it. Now, in addition to re-establishing routines, I'm also needing to create habits to heal.
Things that didn't work the past few weeks -
1. I wasn't mindful about eating in a way that made my body feel the best.
2. I didn't work out which led to me internalizing stress.
3. I had a full schedule and didn't give myself time to decompress, process, and create.
4. I didn't set aside time to have devotions and hear what God was trying to speak to me.
5. I was irritable with Luis over stupid things.
Things that DID work -
1. I practiced new skills by sanding glitter off a room in my house that I am going to be painting.
2. I let myself be vulnerable and cry with friends.
3. I expressed gratefulness for and to my husband for his sweet and kind care of me.
4. I've been reading a book on my lunch break about women pilots - a subject I dearly love. I even got to read it over a latte one evening.
5. I explored locally as I showed a friend around my city and we got to go inside the Reading Pagoda which was really cool.
6. I attended a women's real estate meet-up where I was delightfully taught and challenged about goal setting for a joy-filled life.
7. I booked a solo weekend trip I'll be going on in a few months to relax and create space.
8. Goal setting and date nights with Luis.
But how do I figure these things out? I pause in the midst of chaos and take time to process what is working and what isn't working in my life.
In order to do that, I have to guard my time carefully. I have to say no to people, dreams, ideas, and things that just can't have a place in my life right now. I say yes to things that keep me healthy - time with God, date night with my husband, community with close friends, green tea with ginger and honey, time alone, writing, adventures.
"Practice the pause. When in doubt, pause. When angry, pause. When tired, pause. When stressed, pause. And when you pause, pray."
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